The other day while I was doing some chore , I was thinking about compliments and I realized that I compliment people on a regular basis, quite a bit. Which got me asking myself why…
The first conclusion that I came to, is that my complimenting isn’t really an outward action. Meaning, it’s not something I do for others as much as I do it for myself.
When I was a week shy from 19, I got my first tattoo, as a commitment to myself to be happy.
Happiness is a state of being, and it is a conscious choice that you make all day everyday.
This commitment required me to investigate and dwell on those things that made me happy about life, to counteract all the things that well, didn’t.
Every time I look at my tattoo, I think about who I was when I got it, and who I had been vs. who I am now.
The difference is that now , I do what it takes for me to be happy. And that means I focus on all the things, small or big, epic or insignificant, dorky or awesome, that make me smile, giddy, giggle, warm & fuzzy, slightly happy or just ecstatic with joy.
And that, a lot of the time translates into me complimenting your hair, because it makes me so happy to see your hair beautifully blowing in the wind with the light shining on it and bringing out all kinds of wonderful otherwise-invisible colors ! And I tell you and the way you smile and blush a little , really warms my heart and makes me feel even happier!
That’s why I compliment so much, and that’s why you should too!
I know a lot of people who used to be on the ·Frequent·Complimenters·Club· that shied away from it after “bad experiences”.
Usually these bad experiences consist on them not feeling reciprocated in their attitude, comments, and gestures of love and complementation towards others.
If you surround yourself with the same circles of people for years and you realize one day that no one ever seems to point out (or even notice) anything nice about anybody else except you, you can easily develop feelings of resentment and feel like you’re (insert favorite insult) for ever complimenting anybody or being nice at all.
Or …
you could realize, that by complimenting people that are rarely ever complimented, and who rarely compliment others you are almost guaranteed to inspire some kind of reaction within them when and if you do.
You might make them feel very good, and put them in a good mood the whole rest of the day. Or you could make them question what’s up with you & your intentions behind your compliment. Which sooner or later will lead them to realize that you were just acknowledging something delicious about them that day…
and might make them look at humanity in general with different eyes, question whether they’ve got everyone figured out or not.
Any way you look at it., complimenting is a wonderful way of celebrating anything or anyone you encounter in your way who helps you feel happy and joyful to be in this world & to be able to enjoy little or big things along your way.
On the more metaphysical side of things, since we’re all energetic magnets, when we acknowledge and focus on positive things or things that makes us feel good, we inevitably “attract” more things that makes us feel good and that we consider positive.
Something called your RAS or Reticular Activating System plays a big role in all of this. They are a group of cells at the base of your brain stem which help us by filtering the important things from the unimportant so that we can function.
But it does it, based on your beliefs, which are your predominant thoughts or impressions about life and what happens to you.
So your RAS help you see around you more of what you’re thinking about or focusing on. It makes you aware of things that might have been there all along that are perfect opportunities, treats or sources of joy for you and you just “couldn’t” see before, because your senses were already overwhelmed assimilating those more negative or dull things you were focusing on more before.
Your RAS can make things easier for you like when you find yourself in a crowded place and you can barely hear what the person next to you is saying, but the moment someone yells your name-even if they’re far away- you ears immediately pick it up.
Or it can make it more difficult like if you are constantly thinking & talking about how so-and-so never treats you well enough(even if it might be so), then your RAS will help you see more evidence of that being true as well.
So it’s really up to each of us to decide what we focus on, what we think and talk about, what we make “important” for our RAS so it shows us more of it everywhere we go.
So go out & compliment somebody, or stay in and compliment yourself!
Just give it a try, see what happens when you acknowledge out loud whenever you see or come in contact with something or someone you love!
You can start right now by commenting on this post
I love love love clothes, accessories, dressing up…and I’m always very inspired by the girls online who post about their outfits.
Check out my links section & check out their websites/blogs !
In the recent years, to me, it has been way more inspirational to see what my favorite girls were wearing in their everyday lives than what I saw in high fashion / high priced / highly bad for the environment magazines.
Honestly, I am still a sucker for the good old glossy & fine paper & the shiny pictures but now I only buy what I consider to be “collection item” magazines. Or magazines that are so artsy and fantabulous that I will want to keep forever (or at least 5 years ;)) as a treasured object of my affection next to my most beloved books.
So I decided, for my love of clothes & fashion & to join in this internet trend I love so much (and taking pictures of myself,of coarse.hehe.) to record my favorite outfits as they happen…
Hope y’all enjoy.
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I had a WONDERFUL Halloween. It didn’t involve costumes but it did involve dressing up, being super happy and having a great time!
We got our new car! it was exciting! our old one hasn’t been going backwards for about a year! + Our new car is pretty much our dream car. It’s even gotten me wanting to get my driver’s license (I felt no interest towards the matter previously).♥♥♥
This is what I wore:
*H&M pink&white stripped sweater · super cozy with extra long sleeves! + it matches my hair perfectly!
* White D&G top with lace & swarovski crystals collar ·fancy·fancy·fancy· ♥ * Black, bell-bottomed, sailor cut pants from H&M
* A piece of awesome fabric used as a headband
* Swarovski crystal crown earrings that I imagined, fell in love with & then found for a bargain in Denia, Spain in an unexpected moment! bliss!
* Teal corduroy trench coat from Target
* Teal&Pink Juicy Couture Magical Bag ♥
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Also we went to ·the fantastic·the great·the delightful·the badass·Atmosphereshow at The Orpheum in State St. in Madison, WI.
I decided not to dress up because well, these days it feels like me dressed up as me is more than enough, you know?
They said it was the biggest crowd they’ve had so far in this tour . There were at least 1,000 people. Most of them dressed up in ridiculous/awesome/slutty costumes. There was a bit of everything.
I danced the WHOLE show non-stop and sang most of the words. It was fucking mind blowing, honestly.
Sean’s vibe is amazing and powerful and he is such a badass, oldschool, sexy, real motherfucker. It was just a great sweaty musical experience.
I really wanted to meet Sean & Anthony (he’s such a BRILLIANT composer/producer) but it just didn’t work out. Maybe next time
This is what I wore…
* Same pants + top + earrings
* Vest that I got from either my mom or my aunt originally, I can’t quite recall but I used to wear it when I was younger. In my last trip home, I rescued it from my closet and my mom changed the buttons to silver stars, which makes it much better.
* Pink pearls from Urban Outfitters · They were not originally pink but I’m sure you can imagine how they got that way;)
* Rubber lacy looking headband from Target.
Also Gala Darling makes some excellent points on why it’s helpful to take daily outfit pictures here & here .
THANK YOU SO MUCH TO EVERYONE THAT VOTED TODAY!
I can’t express how HAPPY I am about the election’s results.
This is the beginning of a new era.
This is the spirit that makes the United States of America my favorite country.
Welcome to …mmm… or Mystical·Magical·Magnificent. I truly believe that is what life is meant to be for all of us. Delicious.
I am aware of the fact that we live in a world though, in which a lot of the time, this is not the case.
However,it is always possible for you to experience your own life that way, regardless of your circumstances.
And if that’s what you are interested in doing, that’s what I’m here to help you with.
We are all magnificent in our own ways, and we ought to realize that it is our present to the world.
How much you shine and add to this world is in direct correlation to your ability to discover and focus on those sides of yourself that make you feel so motivated & alive, and make them better, more developed, a bigger part of your life.
When you make the best parts of you, the driving force behind your life, everything can change in delightful ways at speeds you never imagined.
Even though I’m all about the fabulousness, the shoes, the clothes, the jewelry, the chocolate and the champagne (I’m sure you are too )… there is a depth to me and you and everyone that we go around being mostly unaware of.
Yet to some extent we all know it’s there. The infinite possibilities of you.
But most of us just don’t know what to do with it or about it.
A big part of that untouchable, indescribable, difficult to deal with part of us is our emotions.
It’s such a hot topic, because they are not only hard to describe but they only really serve the person that is feeling them. So many people feel so powerless and confused about their own emotions, that they normally just shut them off.
Nowadays, especially as a woman, letting your emotions guide you on important life-changing decisions, would be looked down upon by most. Considered irrational,immature or even dangerous..
The truth is that emotions are what give shape to our experiences.
Your quality of life is highly dependent on your emotional state.
What are emotions?
We could say they are the physiological response to your mental state, in other words, they are the physical response to the thoughts that you have been thinking. But they are more than that, they serve also as a sort of compass, what has been called your emotional guidance system.
When you feel good, it means that you have been focusing upon things and therefore thinking thoughts that serve you & are in alignment with who you really are or who your life has caused you to become.
If you feel bad, in any way, that means you are going in the wrong direction.
Stop, don’t go further down that path.
Which means, stop thinking about whatever you’ve been thinking about and focus your attention on something that makes you feel better.
Take the easiest path to your feeling the best you can in any given situation.
This means that if someone in your life is being a pest, instead of letting yourself be swept away by this person’s attitude, try and focus on something about this situation that you like or feel better about, even if it’s only her shoes ignore the rest.
The interesting thing about emotions is that when you really think about it, there’s only two types of emotions : good & bad.
There is a wide range of intensity within this two emotions, but any emotion can be recognized as a good or better feeling emotion, or a bad or worse feeling emotion. The way you know is because one feels good and the other feels bad. It’s that easy.
It seems obvious but it is something that we need to remind ourselves constantly if we intend on living a satisfying, joyful, fulfilling life.
Most of us regularly engage in activities & behaviors that not only don’t make us feel good, but make us feel all kinds of bad. And yet we keep doing these things over and over again, and continue on these paths and we always justify it to ourselves each time we do it. We look for reasons why we should continue to make ourselves feel bad, and we always find them.
I know all about it…I keep watching “Lost” even though I have noticed that I always feel uneasy, jumpy and unsafe for hours after watching it! But it is so addictive & thrilling, right?
It’s in this subtle and little ways that we drown ourselves in bad feelings day after day after day.
I know this happens to you too, in your own life, in its own way; and my point is that very easily, you can turn things around for you and start living in a way that feels better to you, one feeling at a time
The truth is that it is always easier to do what feels better than what feels worse.
This is what I wore…
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